Let God Work

I opened for my lover, but my lover had left; he was gone. My heart sank at his departure. I looked for him but did not find him. I called him but he did not answer. The watchmen found me as they made their rounds in the city. They beat me, they bruised me; they took away my cloak, those watchmen of the walls! O daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you— if you find my lover, what will you tell him? Tell him I am faint with love. Song of Solomon 5:6-8

The woman felt the full sting and pain of what she had done.

Solomon did not inflict the pain upon her; it was the “watchmen,” the faithful guardians of God’s people. If your spouse wrongs you, give God some time to work in your mate’s heart. Let God have an opportunity to deal with the conscience of your spouse. You are not to play the role of Holy Spirit in your spouse’s life.

It's hard to hear the voice of the Lord when someone is continually nagging at you. Instead, we should keep quiet and let God work. It’s amazing how God moves into a person’s life. Truly His ways are higher than man’s ways, and His methods are not only very creative but extremely effective!

If nagging has broken into your relationship, how do you feel about that? Nagging surely won’t help your relationship. Let the Holy Spirit work.

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joy and thanksgiving

Live with thanksgiving, forgiveness, and joy, and enjoy all your moments as if they were your last.

You have control over whether you and your spouse will be "heirs together of the gracious gift of life" (1 Peter 3:7) or partners together in the tension and stress of life.

Be the person who honors, obeys, and loves Jesus by honoring your spouse. Joy is the result of a thankful heart. So, say thanks to God for His grace towards you and spread it around.

searching for joy

The Lord our God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

A woman of true beauty offers others the grace to be and the room to become. Captivating: unveiling the mystery of a woman's soul, p 135

Sometimes we learn by our mistakes. Sometimes we make the mistakes over and over. We cry out, "why do I keep doing this?" As we struggle with our faults and those of others we need to remember how much God loves us and rest in His faithful, unfailing love. Make space for teaching moments in yourself and others.

Search for joy in all circumstances. Choose a cheerful heart vs. the poor me attitude. Practice being cheerful. Practice smiling. Practice being thankful. Count your blessings and rest in the Lord for He is with you. He delights in you. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing. He is mighty to save.

smile

A cheerful heart is good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22

A cheerful heart is the foundation of health and happiness. Everyone is drawn to a smile. Does your spouse see you as a happy thankful person? What can you do today to make your spouse smile?

a helper for the leader

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

God said it is not good for man to be alone and he created a helper for him. Adam is the leader, the head of the house, and Eve is his helper. This is the way God designed marriage. If, as a wife, you try to do the job of leading the family, you will not find satisfaction in it. It is far better that the job be done poorly by your husband than to be done well by you.

This was a real eye opener for me. I've been trying to be in control of the family for so long and it only left me frustrated. It has been a slow change over a few years trying to give up the control. These days I am seeing my husband step into his role of leader while I am learning my role as helper and encourager. Amazing things happen when we follow the Lord's plans.

Think of ways you can start being a helper to your husband.

Date Night

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14

Last night Brad and I went out on a date - dinner and a movie. Before we left Carly said she doesn't remember the last time they had a babysitter - enough said.

Brad and I were really looking forward to our date. Lo and behold the enemy was too. It wasn't long before we were frustrated with each other and felt like we couldn't do much right.

Snap out of it! In the end we were determined to not let the enemy have his way. Setting differences aside we forged on.

Love prevailed.

love resolves conflict

Resolving conflict begins with how you individually choose to respond to a situation. Will you allow your hurt to linger, fester, and grow, or will you give it to the Lord, ask for His help in resolving the situation, and then speak to your spouse later in loving kindness and with a sure and sincere approach that can bring you to positive resolution?

We come to know in our marriages when we have hurt our spouse. There is a look in the eyes, a slumping of the shoulders, a slow walk away, or a spirit of dejection. Before you can ever get across your point of view, it is wise to first ask for forgiveness. It is in this spirit of mutual forgiveness and a desire for mutual continuation of your relationship in love that conflicts are genuinely resolved, a torn relationship is mended, and difficulties are turned into paving stones for a stronger foundation.

What are the signs that your spouse displays when you have hurt them? What do you do when you notice them?

When you see these signs from your mate, make a conscious effort to seek forgiveness.

A Continued Pursuit in Love, Part 4

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