love is not selfish

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard another as more important than yourselves. Philippians 2:3

Whatever you put your time, energy, and money into will become more important to you. It's hard to care for something you are not investing in. Along with restraining from negative comments, buy [or make] your spouse something that says, "I was thinking of you today." The Love Dare, p14

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor. Romans 12:10